Why Do Guys Match and Not Message?

Why Do Guys Match and Not Message?

Before getting overwhelmed with the perspective of your messages and ego, some technical issues can contribute to why the message wasn’t received. As well as technical issues, your game could just be poor.

Let’s take a look at why you’re matching with guys but not messaging you.

Why Do Guys Match and Not Message On Bumble, Hinge, or Tinder

1. Your Message Didn’t Have A Question

Sometimes, the best way to hit it off with anyone you meet on an app is to ask a question when sending a message. Asking a question is considered to be an icebreaker to start the communication process on a smoother note.

Fix – Ask Them A Question

If you are experiencing a delay in a message being sent back to you, based on some of these dating apps and their criteria, you may have to ask a question in order for the message to be received correctly. 

You will get a quicker response than sending a vague statement when you send a question. Some women may not respond well to messages that may come off as too straightforward or messages that don’t have enough intrigue. Although getting to the point in your message is vital, it is also crucial to warm up the conversation before getting to direct statements.

Oh, if you have a delay in response to your message, you may want to rephrase your message from a statement to a question. Doing this will promote interest because the other person feels you are interested in getting to know them.

And although asking a question is simple, be mindful of the type of question you asked them. If you are looking for a response to your message, step outside the box with the question you ask rather than the typical “How are you?” or “WYD”.

Ask a question that would spark the connection between you and the other person. One example could be something simple such as “what do you like to do in your spare time?”

Or, if you see someone that has the same career path as you do, your question could go a little something like this; “I see you have the same career as I do. That is super exciting! How long have you been on your journey with (whatever the job is)?”

It is essential to ensure the question you ask will lead to a conversation with a steady flow. So, once again, you may want to consider asking a question instead. 

2. Your Message Was Too Long

Many people can get carried away when sending their messages. This essentially goes for individuals who tend to overrate their messages, which means that the message they sent was extremely long.

You have to see online dating as if you were dating in person. If you are meeting someone in person and starting a conversation, you want to make sure you are pacing yourself and not asking a million questions in one breath.

If your message is too long, either it was too long for the system of the app to send, or the person that received the message decided not to read it because they saw it was too long.

These are two factors that would have to be considered if you have a delay in response to the message you have previously sent. So, you may have to shop a few words out of your petition.

3. You Didn’t Put Effort Into Your Message

Individuals using dating apps such as Bumble, Tinder, and Hinge tend to ensure they analyze every message extremely carefully. This means if you send a short, vague message, it’s possible that you may not get a response.

Sending a short message saying “What’s up?”, “What are you up to?” or simply saying “Hi” can be a turnoff for the person you send the message to. Even a simple “How are you?” may not make the cut.

If you have an account on a dating app and are taking the initiative to send the first message or respond to a message, you must put effort and creativity into your messages. You want to spark a wink and a smile from the other person, not snoring and an eye roll.

If you don’t put effort into your messages, the other person will notice. If you send a vague message, they will interpret your message as the wage would communicate in person.

You want to ensure your message has an impact and a lasting impression. So, if you really want to connect, put some thought into the words you send before you send them. 

4. They’re Just Not Feeling You

This is something that no one ever wants to hear. If you send a message and have been waiting for a reply for a very long time, if the problem was not the message you sent or the length of the message, it could be that person is just not that into you.

If you have a sense that someone is not that into you, this is something that many people tend to struggle with. But that is perfectly okay. There are many other people that you can connect with.

When you are online dating, just like dating in person, everyone has a type they go for, and everyone can be meticulous about what’s their cup of tea. So, this is an opportunity for you to figure out yours.

Being silently rejected is an eye-opener. This will allow you to change directions on your approach and the people you are connecting with. And if you are silently rejected, it would be better to move on to the next person to connect with rather than waiting for the “it’s not you, it’s me” conversation.

5. Your Message Came on Too Strong

When you create an account for Bumble, Tinder, or Hinge, it is always best to ensure that your emotions are kept in check. Sometimes, if you haven’t received a reply, your message may have become too intense. This is also considered to be a turnoff for most people.

The purpose of online dating, and dating in general, is to get to know someone on the surface. And if it becomes a situation, then you can start asking questions to understand them internally. Some people tend to fall deep too soon. That defeats the purpose of dating.

If the message you sent gives the notion that you want to get married in 24 hours, the other person will see this as a wrong impression. Or, for some people, they may see this as “weird”.

Messages that come off too strong too soon are a quick way to run the other person for the hills. So, before you send a message, be sure to analyze it to ensure it’s not giving the impression that you want to “put a ring on it” the same day you start conversing.

Remember this, when Beyoncé said to “put a ring on it”, she meant if you have built time and history that is more than 5 minutes and a detailed paragraph expressing your love. Moreover, take your time, enjoy conversations, and let nature take its course rather than jumping the gun two sentences too soon.

6. The App Is Down

Yes, if YouTube is down, this can be a major bummer. Most likely, the server for YouTube connections and Communications may be down for a while.

When a server is down, there is little that can be done to resolve any issue since the issue is out of your hands. The problem is now in the hands of the developers of the website/app.

Fix – Wait For App To Go Back Up

Sometimes, when an application or website isn’t working properly, it is due to the server for that app or website currently being down. That cannot be very pleasant for some consumers. However, waiting for the application servers to revive is the only option available.

Usually, suppose there is an internal issue with the app or website. In that case, the app developers will notify consumers via email or text message, notifying them that there is an ongoing issue that they are working hard to resolve.

So, if you are having an issue with not seeing new messages, it’s possible that the server connected to the dating apps decided to shut down for a while. But don’t worry and don’t panic, for this is something that only lasts for a little while. If the server is down, the app will come back up in a timely manner before you know it.

While you’re waiting for the server to come back up, try utilizing your time wisely to pass the time. If one or all of the dating apps are currently down, take some time to meditate on the expectations and characteristics you look for in someone.

Go over your list of criteria for what you consider your partner to be. So once the apps are back up and running, you’ll have a clear perspective on what to search for when dating online. Just food for thought for how to utilize your time productively while waiting for the app(s) to come back up.

7. There’s A Bug

Bugs on social media apps are extremely agitating. There are so many factors that can contribute to a bug. However, the good thing about having a bug is that the issue can easily be fixed primarily on your own.

So, before taking drastic measures and driving yourself insane when waiting for a response, let’s check out some of the quick fixes you can do yourself.

Fix – Restart App

If you haven’t gotten a response, you may want to try restarting your apps. This is a quick reset of the app’s usage. If you reset the app, then you may be able to see replies. If you reset the apps and notice that you still don’t see any responses, you may want to consider the following method.

Fix 2 – Restart Your Device

When people have been using their personal devices for long periods of time without a break, this can be the cause of why the apps aren’t refreshing the messages. There may be too much traffic on your device.

So, a quick restart of your Android or iOS device would be the best option. After you have restarted your device, log back into Bumble, Tinder, or Hinge to see if the replies have refreshed.

Fix 3 – Log Out, Then Back In

One way to resolve this issue is to log out of your apps and then log back in. When the app goes into an “overdrive”, this is a quick way to reset the application so that everything runs smoothly. So, doing a quick reset will most likely resolve the issue.

Fix 4 – Clear Your Cache to Get Rid of The Bugs

If you have a major cache backup, this may be the cause for why you haven’t seen any replies to your messages yet. So, what do you do if you have a critical blockage of cache storage? Exactly! You must clear the cache.

To clear your cache, you must:

1. Open your settings on your device.

2. Navigate to your apps section.

3. Open the app you want to clear the cache from.

4. And tap the option to clear the cache.

The cache is cleared from Bumble, Tinder, or Hinge; reopen the applications to log into your accounts. After logging in, navigate to your message threads to see if the replies messages have refreshed. If you are able to see new messages, you can shout for joy because you have fixed the issue by clearing out your cache.

Fix 5 – Update App to Get Rid Of Bugs

If you are experiencing an issue with waiting on replies to messages that were sent, you may want to consider updating the applications. Updates are vital for the app’s functionality.

To update the application and Android device, you must:

1. Navigate to the Google Play Store.

2. In the search bar of the Google Play store, type in the name of the app you are using (Bumble, Tinder, or Hinge).

3. If the dating apps are already installed on your device, it will show uninstall or update.

4. You will tap on the update to update the application.

For consumers that are using iOS or iPhone devices, to update the application, you must:

1. Open the app store on your device.

2. Scroll down until you see all of your apps.

3. Locate the dating apps you are using (Bumble, Tinder, or Hinge).

If there is an update available for the apps, there will be a tab next to each app showing it’s ready to install.

Install the update to the latest version.

Fix 6 – Wait For Them To Come Out With A Fix

If an ongoing issue occurs with Bumble, Tinder, or Hinge, the developers will reach out to all account holders stating the issue. Most likely, when developers reach out to notify users of the issue, there is a possible resolution that follows. Sometimes, you may get a notification via email if there is an ongoing issue.

If there is a possible resolution, developers of each app will give a step-by-step process of how to resolve the issue. Any solution provided by the developers directly is a process to follow to the letter. So, if Bumble, Tinder, or Hinge reaches out via email with a resolution, it would be wise to follow through with the process as it is listed.

Fix 7 – Contact Support

If you are experiencing technical difficulty with your app, there are always ways for you to contact support to get to the root of the issue.

For Bumble, you can open the app and navigate to the Contact Us page. Once you are on the Contact Us page, click on Help Centre. From here, you are able to type in your issue in the search bar, and many help articles will appear that can assist with resolving the issue. There is no contact phone number for Bumble. So, their helpful articles are available for support.

If you are using Tinder, in your Tinder settings, navigate to the Contact Us section. From there, you will see a section for Help/Support. The contact number for support would be 214-853-4309.

For all the Hinge users, from your Hinge settings, navigate to the Support section, and a page will appear. From that page, you will have the opportunity to search for the issue you are experiencing and glance through some of the fantastic articles that are available for assisting the issue.

8. Poor Internet Connection

When issues like this arise, sometimes, we fail to take into consideration the possibilities of why the issue is happening. One of the most common issues is your internet connection.

If you live in a home where there is a constant flow of an internet signal, and there are multiple devices connected to that signal, this may also be an issue.

When there is an internet connection available, sometimes, the signal only allows a certain number of devices to be connected to it. So, you may want to try disconnecting one of the devices linked to the signal or disconnect your device from the signal and use a different internet connection.

As stated earlier, there are many possibilities that could contribute to this issue. However, with many possibilities, there are many resolutions. Let’s check out a couple of fixes for resolving the issue with your internet connection.

Fix – Turn Your WI-FI Off Then On

If you are experiencing an issue such as not seeing reply messages on your Bumble, Tinder, or Hinge, you may want to check your internet connection.

Your internet connection is what provides a steady signal for your applications to function properly.

If you are using a Wi-Fi connection, ensure your Wi-Fi button is highlighted and turned on. For Android users, you can check this by scrolling your finger from the top of the screen to the bottom until a row of options appears.

On that row, you will see a button for your data, flashlight, rotation, and Wi-Fi. For iOS consumers, from your home screen, go to settings and then tap Wi-Fi. If your Wi-Fi is turned on, tap it to toggle the Wi-Fi off. Once the Wi-Fi is off, toggle to switch again to switch the Wi-Fi signal back on.

If there is no progress, try resetting your modem.

If you are using a data connection, you may want to consider switching to a Wi-Fi connection instead.

If there is an issue with your Wi-Fi connection, it’s highly recommended to reach out to your internet service provider for the resolution.

Fix 2 – Switch from WI-FI to Data

If you are using a Wi-Fi connection and you notice your Wi-Fi signal is the issue, you may want to switch your Wi-Fi connection off and use your data instead.

To use your data on your Android device, drag your finger from the top of your screen to the bottom. Next, you will see your Wi-Fi connection highlighted. If the signal is highlighted, tap it to switch the Wi-Fi signal off and turn on your data connection.

After your data is on, log back into your dating apps, navigate to your message threads, and if new messages appear after logging back in, you now realize that the issue was your Wi-Fi connection.

If there are further issues with your data connection, you may want to reach out to your cellular provider for the inquiry.

David Johnson is a freelance writer with 9 years of experience writing for Techzillo and other established tech outlets like iMore. His focus and key interests are Apple and accessibility as well as consumer technology in general. Read our Editorial Guidlines and Fact Checking process.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here